This April Fools’ Day, here are some suggestions to help you land your next job.
On Your Resume
- Be creative! For example: write in crayon, include rainbows, smiley faces, or GI Joe stickers.
- Employers want to know that you want “a challenging position that utilizes your education and experience”, so your objective statement should be displayed prominently at the top.
- Smart technology auto-corrects all typos and spelling mistakes. It’s much more efficient for the pubic than proofreading.
- Begin all conversations with, “Do you have a job for me?” It’s the most efficient way to cut to the chase.
- The more job search websites you use, the better, but don’t neglect the Sunday paper!
- Let your network know that you’re not picky and “Just need a job. Any job.” Be sure to talk about your fabulous accomplishments as much as possible!
- Try the door-to-door approach. It helps to bring home-made cookies or baked goods.
In an Interview
- Build anticipation by arriving 10 minutes late. Greet with a limp handshake and a firm stare.
- Consider bringing a copy of your 30 page Master’s thesis for your interviewer to read.
- Be sure to inquire about the company’s policy for Monday absences and paid time off for St. Patrick’s Day.
- Act like you don’t want the job. Reverse psychology!
On Social Media
- There’s no need to waste time writing a personalized message when you connect with someone new.
- Send out messages to your entire network every 20-30 minutes: “I’m desperate for a job! Please help!”
- Oops…did I tweet that?
Happy April Fools’ Day!
Please Note: These tips are for fun only!